Well after a stressful first 2 days, we (including Marissa) have settled in. Tuesday was quite stressful as Marissa’s main occupation that day was crying. Even I was beginning to despair of her getting over it!! Later that night though, after crying, of course, she looked up at me, said “ma ma” and held up her arms for me to pick her up. I can’t tell you what a wonderful feeling that was! I knew we’d gotten past the hard times then.
Wednesday we woke up to quiet!! No crying. Breakfast involved crying though as did play time, but she got over her anxiety and anger (yes, she has a temper!) pretty quickly. We had more appointments to go to. Our guide, Peter, is quite a trip. He has more energy than I could summon up in a week! He’s fast, efficient, knows his stuff and wants to get done fast. So were supposed to go to the CAB for our last appointment there – pick up some papers. We did that. Then we had to have Marissa’s Chinese passport photos taken – we did that. Then we asked him to take us to the supermarket so we could get pull ups for Marissa. The local shops all have diapers for babies, but none for big kids like Marissa.
So supermarket shopping in Asia seems to be pretty consistent. Always in some high rise building. Not like in the States where you can travel around Walmart and never ride the escalator. Of course the diapers are on the 5th floor, or maybe it was the 6th. I lost count. Packing Marissa around at 30lbs, walking around 5 floors and riding up 4 or 5 escalators will do that to you. Boy, both of us were sweating by the time we got to the diaper section. We made it though & got that taken care of. We also bought more baby food even though I resented doing it. I’m thinking a 2 ½ yr old should eat solid food, not baby food.
We were due to head home after this, but Peter had other ideas. He’s full of energy remember? So he decided that instead of waiting until next week to do Marissa’s medical exam, we should do it today if the hospital was open. It was. We did it. Boy were we all pooped out afterwards. It was a good thing though because I was worried that Marissa had an ear infection. She’s congested and occasionally pulls at her ear. They said her ears were fine, but she did have a fever. I’d given her Motrin the night before & gave her some more that night. I’ve been giving her Benadryl every morning & that really helps her congestion. I just give her a morning dose of it though as she’s so little. The pharmacist warned that she can be easily dehydrated with it and to use care.
We then headed back to the hotel and arranged with Peter to go to a bird sanctuary (thinking we could stroll around with Marissa in her stroller, right?) and look at the birds for the next day (Thursday). The tour included a stopover at a porcelain factory.
Marissa decided to start eating tonight (Wednesday) night. We were getting concerned, but I think she decided we were okay and so eating was okay too. That was a definite relief. She cried less. We ignored the angry crying (she’s not a very good faker – kinda hard to fake us out without the tears you know) and tried to help her out when she really was needing something – usually a diaper change. She still stands (she’s used to the Chinese hole in the floor toilets) on the toilet, but she doesn’t do anything. I’m keeping her in the habit though for when we get home. She gets a little confused when I have her sit up there, but she’ll figure it out pretty quickly, I think. She is definitely a quick learner.
Thursday we woke up quietly again! She chowed down breakfast like a starving child. We walked around the area here exploring shops, checked out the river, bought some bread at the yummy bakery next to the White Swan Hotel and ate at Lucy’s. They serve western food there. So we ate hamburgers. Marissa ate with us hamburger and all. She likes our food better than cream of rice soup. She loves tomatoes – I only had 3 slices with my cheeseburger and she gobbled them all down. Then she ate the hamburger. Then she ate French fries. The kid was insatiable. She likes fruit too – bananas & apples being our main fruit right now.
In the afternoon, Peter picked us up and took us on our tour. We told him Marissa likes hamburger. I don’t think he was too impressed by that. He has been very good to us and asked us if she was doing better. He has given us lots of advice.
Well remember I said we planned on walking around the bird sanctuary & relaxing? Not to be! We took a wonderful cable car ride to the top of a mountain and then headed off to see the birds. Several hundred stairs later, we crashed at the bird show. While we traversed all the steps with Miss Marissa carried most of the way, we did get to see lots of colorful birds – parrots, swans, cranes, doves, pigeons and ducks. Marissa, we’ve discovered, is lazy. She likes a free ride. The stroller is fine. The hip is fine. All is fine unless she has to expend any energy actually walking around. Of course asking her to walk around on her own involved crying. We ignored it. So she walked where it was flat. Even Peter got tired of listening to her whining and told her to be quiet because mama was tired! He’s great!
After the bird sanctuary we shopped at the porcelain factory. Very pretty things there. We put Marissa in the stroller. Grandma devised a way to tie several baby rattle toys to the stroller handle and that kept Marissa entertained while we looked. Marissa is fascinated with mirrors so we bought her a handheld one and she now carries it everywhere staring at herself. Whenever she looks in a big mirror, she points at herself and starts smiling and giggling. Quite funny I must say.
We head back to the hotel after this once again all pooped out. Marissa ate so much for dinner that you’d think we’d never fed her! We think she was only eating because we were – she had her meal first & then we ate – except it ended up being she ate & then we all ate! She happily played on her own for awhile then before going down, quietly I might add, to bed at 7pm. Bedtime at the orphanage was 9pm, but she gets tired earlier and me and grandma agree that 7pm is a good time for a toddler to go night, night. Marissa agrees and promptly fell asleep after staring at herself in the mirror for awhile. I did say she likes her mirror, didn’t I?
This morning (Friday) we had breakfast and then went for a walk. Marissa wasn’t that hungry. She fussed a little, but nothing big. I would say we’re a family now. We headed off to look at the shops in The White Swan Hotel. Very nice. It’s a 5 star hotel and usually adoptive families stay there, but because of the import/export fair, it’s been booked up.
Peter met us later in the morning for some paperwork stuff. I filled all that out while Marissa napped. We had jelly sandwiches for lunch. She likes that too. Peter suggested we stay at the White Swan this weekend because the hotel rates go way down, & I do mean way down, on the weekend. So we agreed to move. The White Swan is very nice. If I said it before, I can’t say it enough. They have a playroom there exclusively for adoptive families. We get it all to ourselves. Breakfast and crib are included in the price. Here at the Victory Hotel we have to pay extra. So we move tomorrow and stay there until the 24th. Then we will be moving back to the Victory Hotel for 2 nights. Then we move to the hotel that’s next to the airport. Definitely a must if you have an early morning flight like ours. We leave at 8:20am to come home & who wants to get up at 2am with a toddler and take off for the airport? Not me. The airport hotel is connected to the international terminal of the airport, so it’s just a hop, skip and a jump and we’re there. It’s a lot cheaper too. Peter is just full of good ideas.
We met some more adoptive families. We are the only ones in our group, but there are other groups here from all over the world. Spain & US mainly. These are Americans so we chatted awhile with them. One of them is adopting a special needs girl like Marissa. You want to know what her special need is? Of course you do. Her eyes are crossed. Well there you have it. Such a minor problem & one easily fixed. All the babies are developmentally delayed. Apparently for every 3 months they spend in the orphanage, they lose 1 month of development. Sounds about right as I’ve estimated Marissa to be somewhere between 12 & 18 months developmentally. I’d place her closer to the 18 month mark than 12 month. We also learned from Peter, that at least at the orphanage where Marissa was – YangDong – they do not take the children for trips outside the orphanage. So they never get to leave it. They do get to go outside, but no trips. No wonder the poor girl cried and cried. What a change to go from such a predictable routine to our crazy schedule and throw in a little sightseeing of the world as well.
For those of you planning on shopping for Marissa, here’s the answer to the clothes question you all had. She wears a 3T. 4T would be fine as well. Do we really need anything? No. But have fun, we will all enjoy it. We could use a few toys that will help her developmentally. So toys for a 12 – 24 month old would be about right. She loves mirrors, doesn’t know what a ball is and hasn’t figured out brightly colored things yet. She does tap her toes to music. She loves baby rattles & she’ll imitate everything I do. So happy shopping!! & Thank you all for your wonderful support. This is a great experience and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
