Today was another fairly restful day, but important day in terms of Zeke’s bonding with us. We started out with Zeke having a tantrum when Heather put him down for a minute after having held and snuggled with him for about an hour. We decided to let him have that tantrum and went about our business. He finally looked around and realized that no one was paying attention to his screaming and carrying on and quit.
Well, Zeke’s next tantrum was when we were all about to leave the room for breakfast and Steve thought Zeke should walk and hold his hand, rather than being carried. We all just sat around, as Zeke screamed and kicked his legs, waiting until he finished. About 20 minutes or so later, Zeke was ready to stand up, hold Steve’s hand, and move forward.
We made it as far as the hall when he started his third tantrum of the morning, this time again because Steve wouldn’t pick him up. Well, back to the room. This tantrum lasted about 15 minutes, and then Zeke was ready to stand up and hold Steve’s hand.
We left our room and made it as far as the elevator when the fourth tantrum started. Back to the room to wait. This time Zeke was finished in about 10 minutes.
On our next attempt we made it on to the elevator and off at the lobby. Once at the lobby tantrum number five started and, you guessed it, back on the elevator all 7 of us went and back to the room. This tantrum lasted for about 5 minutes.
Once again we all started out and made it on the elevator, down to the lobby and about 10 steps into the lobby. By now the hotel staff had gathered, although they tried to look discrete, to see how far we’d make it this time. The sixth tantrum of the morning started so we went back to the elevator and up to the room. That tantrum only lasted about a minute and Zeke got up, smiled and took Steve’s hand.
Finally, we not only made it to the lobby, but all the way to breakfast for a great meal. Zeke was so happy, laughed, and seemed to thoroughly enjoy himself. After breakfast we all went for a walk in a nearby park and had a great time. Zeke had no more tantrums, was willing to walk, and actually enjoyed himself. This was the best he’s done. He played with the other kids and was not nearly so immobilized by clinging onto someone. In fact, we think he’s learning that he’s loved and we’re there for him all the time and he’s not going to manipulate our behavior with tantrums. That’s our goal at least.
We had one more tantrum after dinner, the result of us telling him he’d be second in line to take a bath, not first as he had hoped, but it resolved quickly. He had a great bath even after having to wait an extra 10 minutes or so for it to be his turn.
We’re sure we’ll have a few more tantrums to deal with, but they seem to be decreasing in number and duration. We think that this is a great little guy, with a great personality, who is not used to being told no.
We have to say that after our series of tantrums, Zeke is doing the best he’s done so far. We think that setting limits, while snuggling and doing things together, early on, will make the transition smoother and easier for Zeke. We definitely don’t want to let bad behavior be acceptable here and then change the rules completely once home. That would be more difficult for Zeke, we think, then setting reasonable limits from day one.
During naptime Steve, Joe, Emily and Leila walked to a store about a half hour away and bought two strollers. That’ll make things easier when out and about.
Other than tantrums and strollers, and a walk in the park, it’s been a slow, but productive day. Tomorrow we’re off to the notary and the orphanage.
